Crazy Mormons Beliefs

Hello Funny One here. The US Elections are soon, Mitt Romney’s a Mormon. Do we know anything about the Mormons? They have some crazy beliefs. Here are some of them.

10. Mormons have to pay one-tenth of all their interest annually.

9. No coffee, no drugs, no tobacco.

8. Apparently everyone on Earth has a spirit in the pre-existence. When you die, your spirit is separated from your body. If you were good you would go to “spirit paradise.” If you were bad you would go to “spirit prison.” The spirit world exists as a place for spirits to go while awaiting the second coming.

7.  Almost everyone who knows anything about the Mormon religion knows they have a prophet. What many don’t know, is anything that the prophet says in official capacity is considered official canon.

6. The Mormons believe that Jesus visited America.

5.  Mormons believe that God, Jesus and resurrected beings have bodies of “flesh and bone.”

4. In the LDS religion any worthy male can be given the priesthood and is given specific duties. Black people were not allowed to have the priesthood until 1978. Females are not allowed to have the priesthood.

3. Mormons believe that there are three heavens: the Celestial Kingdom, Terrestrial Kingdom, and Telestial Kingdom. The Celestial is the highest, where God and the ones who followed his law reside. The Terrestrial is the middle, where people who followed the Law of Moses reside. The Telestial is the lowest, where the ones who followed carnal law reside.

2.  Mormons believe that you can be forgiven for any sin, save two. First, denying the Holy Spirit, and second, murder.  Also, God is infinitely forgiving, until the second coming. After that, you end up where you end up, no matter what. There are no second chances. Period.

1. Mormons believe that God created multiple worlds and each world has people living on it. They also believe that multiple gods exist but each has their own universe. We are only subject to our God and if we obtain the highest level of heaven we can become gods ourselves.

Crazy. Anyways, I’ll leave it here for now.

Rod Stewart – Bum And Coke

Hello Funny One here with some weird news. Did you know that Rod Stewart and Ronnie Wood took drugs up their butts. Rod Stewart made the sensational drug confession while promoting his new book. He revealed that he and his former Faces band mate Ronnie Wood used to shove cocaine up their bottoms using a suppository. Ronnie was worried that the class-A substance was ruining his septum, so they decided to come up with  another, way to get their drug high. Rod said “We put them in a little pill like the French do them, a suppository.” That is so stupid. Who the hell would want to do something as idiotic as that?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2223876/Rod-Stewart-confessed-used-shove-cocaine-bottom.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Mitt Romney and Lindsay Lohan

Hello Funny One here. Did you know that Lindsay Lohan is backing Mitt Romney? When asked if about the election she said, “I just think employment is really important right now. So, as of now, Mitt Romney. Four years ago, Lindsay Lohan referred to Obama’s Presidential victory as  “amazing,” but now it seems the “Mean Girls” star has had a serious change of heart. Lohan also hinted at secretive underlying reasons for supporting the GOP  candidate and turning her back on Obama under wraps. “It’s a long story, but you’re going to have to wait for that,” she remarked,  adding that she would have liked to watch the Ryan vs. Biden debate. And this isn’t the first raving political move Lohan has made in recent  weeks. Last month, the problematic actress went as far as to tweet the President  requesting he “cut taxes for those who need it: middle-class families, small  businesses” as well as “those that are listed on Forbes as ‘millionaires’.” Her ever-changing hair color is another lengthy story. “It’s actually the wrong color than it’s supposed to be,” said Lohan. “But it’s the color of my natural hair and it will get there.” I don’t get it, What does that mean? Anyways I’ll leave it here. I have drawn a picture of what may have changed her mind to now vote for Romney.

Cuckoo: 3. Ken on E

Hello Funny One here. I watched Cuckoo last night, it was so funny. Ken is over the moon when he is picked to become a local councillor. Cuckoo is full of advice, as politics is his specialist subject, after all. Cuckoo looked so funny in Kens suit pants. There were so big on him. Ken and Cuckoo bond. Ken takes his painkiller for his back pain but Dillon gave him drugs instead. Cuckoo takes some of them and they have a wild night. Cuckoo gives Ken a massage . Cuckoo has magic hands. I wouldn’t say no to a massage from Cuckoo. Later they are dancing to music. I love Cuckoos dancing. They go online and buy concert tickets and a drum kit. Lorna and Rachel go to Connie’s for the evening. Rachel’s ex, Zeb is also there. Ken and Cuckoo go driving in the potato van.  They go to the party that Dillon is at. It’s cringy when Zeb sings to Rachel. He’s disgusting! Why would anyone pick him over Cuckoo? After hearing him singing she has to leave. Who wouldn’t leave? It’s so funny when Ken falls through a glass table and then he gets up and cheers. It was also funny when he vomits all over Nina. I can’t wait for the next episode.

I e-mailed NBC  to ask them for information about how I can audition for SNL. I would so love to be on SNL. That would be so cool! Anyways i’ll leave it here for now.